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PSYCHOLOGICAL HELP, EMDR, AND TRAUMA THERAPY FOR PERFECTIONIST, PRESSURED, AND PEOPLE-PLEASING MOMS

Others see you as a woman who does know how to juggle with life. But if you are completely honest, you find yourself in survival mode.

It makes you feel stuck, vulnerable, confused, frustrated and stressed. You just can’t continue like this.

Moms&More is here to help you. Without a long waiting list.

PSYCHOLOGICAL HELP, EMDR, AND TRAUMA THERAPY FOR PERFECTIONIST, PRESSURED, AND PEOPLE-PLEASING MOMS

Others see you as a woman who does know how to juggle with life. But if you are completely honest, you find yourself in survival mode.

It makes you feel stuck, vulnerable, confused, frustrated and stressed. You just can’t continue like this.

Moms&More is here to help you. Without a long waiting list.

Nikolien Martina-Doorenbos

As a mother, do you often feel overwhelmed, like you have to do everything right and please everyone? On the outside, it may seem like you have everything under control, but inside, you feel the pressure growing. Your perfectionism, fretting, and constant striving to keep others happy have put you in a vicious cycle of survival.

You feel stuck and sometimes powerless. Stress increases, and you find yourself frustrated, not only at yourself, but sometimes at those around you. The truth is that you can’t keep this up any longer, and you don’t have to.

You’re not happy

Behind these feelings, there is often deeper pain.

Trauma, often invisible to the outside world, can have a strong impact on how you function. You may be carrying the burden of unprocessed experiences that have shaped you into who you are today. It may be past experiences, such as emotional neglect, control or criticism during your upbringing, or painful relationships that have affected your self-esteem. Or maybe you have been through intense experiences that you have not been able to process.

These experiences can take root in your daily life in subtle ways, and cause you to constantly pass yourself by. Trauma can manifest itself in perfectionism, anxiety, and the feeling that you always have to do “more” to be enough, to be safe or to feel at peace.

For yourself and your children

It is time to reflect on what you need.

Moms&More can help you address the cause of your struggles by going to the problem behind the problem.

Together, we work on breaking old patterns so that you regain space to grow, let go, and truly enjoy your life and motherhood. Instead of keeping running and trying to control everything, you learn to let go and make space for yourself.

Your healing is not only a gift to yourself, but also to your children and those around you.

Moms&More

For yourself and your children

It is time to reflect on what you need.

Moms&More can help you address the cause of your struggles by going to the problem behind the problem.

Together, we work on breaking old patterns so that you regain space to grow, let go, and truly enjoy your life and motherhood. Instead of keeping running and trying to control everything, you learn to let go and make space for yourself.

Your healing is not only a gift to yourself, but also to your children and those around you.

Moms&More

Deep down you:

  • Have scratches on your soul and cracks in your heart, and feel insecurity, stress, trauma, burnout, anxiety, depression, frustration, and sadness.
  • Feel tremendous pressure and responsibility to keep everything under control.
  • Have continuous head chatter. You have lost connection with your feelings,
  • Worry about the future and what this will do to your children.
  • Fear that one day you will end up rejected and unloved.
  • Are massively overworked and overwhelmed to get it all done, facing constant challenges in an already stressful life.
  • Feel confused by the emptiness you feel, like something is missing, and you just can't put your finger on it.
  • Feel like a failure: ‘why can’t I just be happy, when I have so much to be grateful for?.’
  • Are intimidated and feel judged by the people you are surrounded with. You feel small, and not good enough.
  • Are frustrated, stuck, and lost, because you think you should be able to figure this all out by yourself. And realize that you can't do this on your own.

With possible reimbursement if you have Dutch health care insurance

Above all, what you want is to be freed from the constant pressure to be perfect and please others. You long for inner peace, where you no longer feel you have to meet external expectations. Instead of constantly neglecting yourself, you want to learn how to guard your boundaries and make space for your own needs and emotions.

An important goal for you is to let go of negative patterns created by your past. You want to process old trauma so that it no longer determines your behaviour and thoughts in the present. Indeed, by healing these unprocessed experiences, you will gain more control over your life, instead of constantly being in a survival mode. You want to learn how to free yourself from the fears and insecurities that are currently holding you back.

You also strive for a healthier balance between taking care of others and taking care of yourself. You want to learn how to stop putting yourself last, and how to take your own needs seriously without guilt. By investing in your own well-being, you want to function better not only as a mom, but also as an individual. You long to feel like you are enough, just the way you are.

You want to be stronger, deal with the challenges of everyday life with more confidence, and stop getting carried away by perfectionism and worry. Therapy will give you tools to react differently to stress, so that you can stay calmer and more balanced, regardless of the circumstances.

In the personal and tailor-made “Transform & Thrive” program, I help you in as many sessions as you need for one fixed program price and with the promise of real and lasting results. So you know in advance exactly where you stand. This program can be (partially) reimbursed by your Dutch health care insurance.

So you can start enjoying life again. You experience a state of being in which you no longer feel constantly overwhelmed, but in which you can make choices from inner peace and freedom. From this place of calm, you will be able to interact lovingly and authentically with yourself and your environment. And this is important, because you know you are a role model for your children.

Come out of survival mode...

Nikolien Martina-Doorenbos Moms&More

Let me help you.

As a licensed and registered therapist, I specialise in helping moms who experience psychological problems and unprocessed trauma. I focus on helping women who feel overwhelmed by perfectionism, worry and the need to please others.

In my practice, I offer a personalised and tailored programme including (online) EMDR, trauma therapy, and behavioral therapy in which my clients can process their emotional burdens, heal from past trauma, and free themselves from patterns that keep them in survival mode.

My approach emphasises building emotional resilience enabling moms to reconnect with themselves and all roles in their lives. By addressing both mental and emotional challenges, I help my clients find inner peace and fulfilment, so that they can flourish both personally and in their work.


Winner Best Female Personal Development Coach 2023 (Netherlands) – Benelux Enterprise Awards 2023


Contact me

What others say

I have already tried many different things, so I knew how to deal with certain situations, but it did not feel that way. Now that I have completed my program with Nikolien, I don’t just know how to do things I want/have to do it, but it also feels good when I do in this way! This makes the big difference for me between working with Nikolien and other things I’ve done. Nikolien is honest and straight forward and she helps you to move forward and face things. If you are not sure whether you should take this route, I would definitely recommend doing it, give it to yourself!
Anonymous– Medical Specialist
My goal was to get out of survival mode and be able to accept my current situation, and - if I was lucky enough - to be able to enjoy my life again. After our program I was calm, happy, content an active. My life is exactly the same, but I go along with it differently. Of course I still have an annoyance or frustration from time to time, but that will be gone in no time. The emotional roller coaster in negativity is gone for good. I can recommend it to any woman who is ‘stuck’. Nikolien is very ‘what you see is what you get’. That really appealed to me. She only wants to work with you if you really go for it, if you are really committed. What I liked is that you must take full responsibility and that she can only help you in that way. I believe that is so true. Nikolien is sincere, sharp, positive, and honest. She is direct and she expects that in return. Before I started the program I thought ‘Shall I go on? Going on holiday or doing this route with Nikolien? But then it occurred to me that after a trip I would of course go back in the same shit. I decided to start the process and after one session I already knew I had made a great decision. When you are emotionally well in your own skin, you always have a holiday in your head.
Lucie– Coach
I came to Nikolien with a question about my work. Things were not going so well, in terms of work and private life, but it seemed too much to me to tackle all of this at once. But Nikolien insisted on that to do that anyway because everything works together, is interrelated and is influencing each other. And it was the right decision to work on everything at once. I achieved tremendous results in a very short time! I quit my job without any outlook on another one but I knew what I wanted to do and that new job came my way within a few weeks! I also started a new study and I made positive decisions in my relationship. On the one hand I worked hard, but on the other hand I also have the feeling that it came naturally. What I liked about Nikolien’s way of working is that in a very practical way, she achieves quick results. We also did some sessions via Zoom, which saves a lot of time and is really effective. Nikolien is really a rock. Very calm and confident. If she says it will work, you just believe that. For me she was listening and holding back at just the right times or at other times a bit stern and bold. I have been coached and guided by people before, but the insights or results usually faded away quickly. I am writing this testimonial a few months after completing the program and I can sincerely say that the results of the sessions stick. It is not that everything in my life is perfect now or that I will never fall into my pitfalls again, but I feel much better how to adjust and dare to do so. I have taken a new path and am now figuring out where that road leads exactly to, but I enjoy the journey.
Shirley Mather
Through the program I have achieved the goal that I know which work suits me and what makes me happy. What is different for me, is that I am more positive and happier in life. I am enthusiastic, can put certain situations into perspective and have become calmer at home, also to the kids. I have found more peace in my current work because I know which way I want to go. I also noticed that I can’t stand people who are negative and are ‘nagging’ in my eyes instead of taking action. I was very excited to start this program. Normally, I am very down to earth and this makes me always want to know why things happen or how something works. Now, I just let it go, not trying to understand how it works, just undergo. I feel calm and that brings me so much. I feel strong and balanced. I used to feel unbalanced often and just continued on as before. Now when I experience difficulties, I can better put them into perspective. Nikolien was great. She is very good in her communication and guidance. She puts you at ease in the right way and knows how to get you to take action. She is there for you 24/7, this feels nice and familiar. I think it’s admirable how in such short time she develops a bond of trust and insight into your situation. It felt nice and good to be guided by Nikolien. I am so happy that I came into contact with Nikolien and when I speak to mothers in my area of whom I think this program can be valuable I will certainly not hesitate to recommend Nikolien because I grant everyone the experience I have got.
Gladys Salvadori- HR Advisor at AM group
My program made me stronger, I believe more in myself and my abilities. That makes me a lot more confident in life, more daring to choose for myself and find a new balance between my family, my responsibilities and what I want to achieve for myself. The program has given me more insight into myself and a better feeling about myself, more joy and a number of solutions that I can use nicely in my personal development process, starting my own business and for my family. Nikolien has given me a feeling of warmth, trust and security; she is decisive, clear, punctual and flexible. I found her guidance very pleasant and enlightening. I was a bit skeptical beforehand, despite my own choice. However, the results surprised me. I feel more positive about myself, dare to express more what I feel and what I do or don’t want to do. Also I feel more energetic, more decisive and have less guilt towards myself and my family. It is ok what I do, even if one day you haven’t achieved everything on your to-do-list. That gives me more peace and I have enough energy left to pick up the thread again the next day. The program gives you a lot of new insights and I can recommend it to everyone.
Sanna
I have experienced the program as very positive. I was a bit skeptical beforehand, but it really works. I feel that I have actually changed, more positive, more open and honest in what I feel I am much more energetic and pick up more. Sometimes it is difficult at first to immediately see what is meant with a certain insight, but Nikolien manages very well to put you in the right direction so you can really move forward and gain a new understanding. She can also motivate you very well to really get the most out of the program. I am really changed by this program and it has provided me with many valuable insights. I recommend it to everyone.
Evelien- Lawyer